All the Feels, Biblical Truths, Exposed Series, Get Real Series, Writing

The Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad, Most Amazing Day Ever

Have you ever had one of “those” days? The Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad, Most Amazing Day Ever

You know…the days when you literally open your eyes at daybreak and feel incompetent, irritable, grouchy, little, insignificant, beaten-down, not worthy or good enough? Days that mark the EVE of your 3rd born and 1st daughter turning 16, the days that start with your car almost running into your house because you jump out it in a fit of rage to drag the trashcan to the street because there is NO OTHER HUMAN AT YOUR HOUSE THAT CAN POSSIBLY DRAG A TRASHCAN TO THE STREET and your car was still in reverse and so it literally started to roll backwards into your house but stopped short thanks to the overgrown rose bushes and your 15 yr old daughter who thinks fast and throws the car in park (and it makes a scary noise and you are sure the transmission just fell out on the driveway, oh and the car keeps rolling) all while you are trying to hop back into the moving car without losing a limb (or toe) to press the brakes before it hits the side of the house.?

You know the days that you have a bogus $65 charge show up on your bank statement because idiots steal stuff and hack your account and make your life miserable because you don’t need that pesky $65 when you only get paid once a month, are 100% responsible for paying all expenses for your children (except for one mthly pymt), and it’s your daughter’s 16th b’day month and because you have nothing better to do than try and figure out how in the heck to access your apple ID, itunes, icloud, apple/orange, ID password acct of which you’d LOVE to spend an hour trying to make work!!!! ????  Besides who cares about a mere $65…right??? I mean what’s $65 when you are riding out the last 4 days of the LONGEST. MONTH. EVA???? Oh, wait…YOU don’t care about $65? OK…great…that would be J U L I E C. O W E N at REGIONS bank acct number 0285xxxx ;).

You know…the days when you get home from work and are GENUINELY SHOCKED AND PROUD that you didn’t get arrested for public intoxication (even though you weren’t drinking but the way you felt like acting could certainly have been misconstrued as such, “Hollar Hannah”…just sayin, yall), going postal on some random stranger, or ramming into another car who may have beat you to a parking place but because “you have better insurance” you would do it anyways (can I get some “Fried Green Tomatoes” love, ladies? #TAWANDA #PREACH, showing my age, SO. NOT. SORRY)?

Days when you do, in fact, make it home without handcuffs and all in one piece, only to come inside and realize your internet and cable have been disconnected for the 4TH MONTH IN A ROW (for non-payment…AHEM…in my defense…I pay my internet bill EVERY MONTH ON TIME, and call them and say CANCEL. MY. CABLE, then they don’t cancel it and then it appears that I am behind on my bill and then have to pay them $39+??? to get current and then they say they’ll cancel my cable AGAIN, BUT THEY NEVER DO!!!! Oh and they should have the recorded calls (for quality assurance (insert eye roll)) to prove my story of me telling them repeatedly since MAY to CANCEL. MY CABLE.) so you have to call WOW to tell your story for the gazillionth, trillionth time and then you literally act a fool and give the CSR what for (as if it’s her fault; it was bad, yall…like I was MEAN and hateful…I apologized but only after I started crying over the phone; it’s a wonder she didn’t call the “authorities” on me right then and there) and give her the only credit card number that is not maxed out, pay the designated amt of $39.xx?? and 5 minutes later instead of enjoying your internet that has been restored, you have a 30-minute ALL OUT ugly-crying, like a crazed maniac, holding a fetal position wishing for a straight jacket, face down on your bed like you’ve completely lost your S**t mind because guess what, yall? YOU HAVE…ahem…I HAVE!

THEN…you gradually peel yourself up off the bed. Change clothes…wash your face…and put on your big girl panties and call your girls out of hiding from their rooms, and then do EXACTLY what you said you would do. You take those precious girls and BFF (practically your 3rd daughter) to pick out birthday presents for their daddy who turns 50 tomorrow. You drag yourself to Dollar Tree and Target to buy some various food items, hair dye for BFF, presents for Daddy (see below, picked out by Ava Reese herself), and even a Rapunzel wig as her treat for being such a good shopper.

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The days when you do all of the above and then your 3 yo has a meltdown (crying on the floor, which hey, let’s face it…I’d do it to if I thought I could get away with it) in Target while mommy is checking out because her big sister won’t let her walk off with a squeezable applesauce from the Starbucks area without paying for it (MKat is a good big sister but the fact that she was chanting at Ava Reese “stop trying to steal that” and Ava Reese loudly defending herself “I’m not steewing it, MACY!” may have escalated the situation…sounds reasonable…#nothievesallowed). When all of the sudden, said 3 yo gets up running towards me saying “Mommy, come here, there is a SKUNK in Target” with such conviction that you wonder yourself if there REALLY is, in fact, a SKUNK in Target! Rushing over to see the “skunk” only to find a pig (YUP) in a “stroller” making your baby girl laugh her head off and you take a picture because you know she’s gonna want to relive this one and YALL…IT’S A PIG IN TARGET.

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To then load up the car, head to Chick-Fil-A, allow your 3 yo to order her own food even though it takes longer because she can and LOVES doing it. And you leave the drive-thru knowing the three precious souls in your care are full, feel safe, secure, and loved.

You know…the days when you get home to unload everyone and everything from the car. Exhausted. Empty bank account. Almost maxed credit card. To make the time to put the “Tangled hair-piece” on your 3 yo just because you said you would and she acts as though the $1 you spent is going to have an incredible impact on her future for years to come and of course you take a picture because at this rate that may be as close as she ever gets to loooong blonde locks (bless her ;), Rapunzel AFTER she cuts her hair ;)). To then lay in bed with her and tell her an “Ann Scott/popsicle” story for the gazillionth, trillionth time and almost fall asleep in her bed.

The days when you bust into the bathroom to crash the “hair dying” party via IG live because you’ve dyed your own hair a million times before and your almost 16 yo daughter and her bestie want your opinion and advice and then you do some cringey things on camera just so they can have a few laughs at your expense. Then one of the friends watching the “live” hair dying session says “your mom is so nice”.

The days when you FINALLY get in bed, way more exhausted than you thought you were only 4 hrs earlier and you know your 3 yo can sleep easy knowing EVERY need that she has was met before her eyes closed. That she will be able to surprise her daddy with gifts that she picked out especially for him tomorrow on his 50th b’day (although I am anxious to see quite how she is going to explain that “peppa pig nightlight” she picked out for “him” BAHAHA).

The days when you decide to PRIORITIZE writing down your heart and thoughts via your blog instead of putting it off, starting a post to finish later (I have sooo many, yall), or simply doing something else and you realize that you only took pictures of your little and her adventures tonight instead of your soon to be 16 yo daughter because they are too busy documenting their own fun in their own way?

Ever have one of THOSE days?

When as you are typing you can hear your “still 15-year-old for a few more hours” daughter and her best friend since kindergarten laughing together in her room and knowing that if she gets her driver’s license tomorrow, things will NEVER be the same. She will ALWAYS choose to drive herself places. She will gain an independence for which my soul desires and my heart aches. She won’t “need” you (ahem…ME) anymore in that way.

Have you ever had one of those iconic days on the eve of milestone birthdays that are full of tears aplenty to fill the ocean, anger and bitterness enough to wound a nation, joy enough to heal every sin-sick soul, peace enough to conquer the middle east, financial unrest to challenge investors, irony to compete with Jonah and his unexpected journey to Ninevah, sprinkled with baby pigs in Target named “Princess Rosie” (no joke, yall), IG hair-dying episodes, and run-on sentences that would rival William Faulkner himself?

No?

Well, I have.

Happy SWEET 16th Birthday, Macy Kate.

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My wish for you is that you will forever know your worth is in CHRIST alone! NO ONE can ever take that from you. EVER!
YOU are worthy.
YOU are enough.
YOU are strong.
YOU are HIS!

the whole truth & nothing but,
jco

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4 thoughts on “The Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad, Most Amazing Day Ever”

  1. Denise Ramsey said it all… Bless your sweet little pea-pickin’ heart, girl. I love you, daughter of God, sister of mine, honest soul, mother of blessed children, Southern belle… It’s good to let it out! 💞

    Like

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