All the Feels, Broken, Lessons Learned, Top 10

10 Things I Learned After My Divorce Post

WOW!! What a response. I am in shock and awe, completely humbled and overwhelmingly grateful for the outpouring of love, encouragement and “virtual thumbs up” I’ve received last week since my post about me being newly divorced. WOW…THANK YOU!!!

My prediction of it being the most read article was spot on and far surpassed my expectations! With 800 views/reads within 4 hrs of it posting and reaching 1225 for the day, suffice to say I may have struck a nerve with people.

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Perhaps the most interesting tidbit is that I’d forgotten all about the fact that I’d scheduled it to hit on Thursday 5/3. I’d written it over a month ago and scheduled it to post then forgot about it. I wasn’t even entirely sure I had the guts to “publish” it. Oh well…”it’s too late for second guessing myself now,” I thought once it hit my Facebook page (automatically connected to blog posts).

So…what are the top 10 things I learned from readers which includes complete strangers, facebook friends, family members, old high school friends, acquaintances, and close friends?

  1. People APPRECIATE the realness and vulnerability in my post. Perhaps, we all need a little bit of courage from time to time and apparently, my post may have given some the gumption they needed to get it done.
  2. People RECOGNIZE the importance and seriousness of the breaking up of the most sacred covenant relationship ordained by God. In a world where you can get married and divorced in a drive-thru is indicative of instant gratification of which we all suffer.
  3. People are SAD about divorce. No matter what the circumstances, hearing about divorce makes them feel sorrow.
  4. People are HURTING! I lost count of the number of private messages and text messages I got from people saying they too are struggling in their marriage, have already been divorced, or just going through difficulties in general.
  5. People SEE things, DECIDE what they mean, and OPERATE on that assumption. EX. I can’t tell you how many people thought we had a “perfect life”. And by “perfect” of course, I don’t mean they thought we were flawless. However, because I’ve openly shared so many positive things about my life on social media, they assumed that must mean we would never fall victim or end up in a divorce. I’m not saying this is right, wrong, or indifferent, just simply an observation and one of which we all must be aware. We tend to believe the best and inaccurately assign the “facebook highlight reel” to “REAL life”. AND just for the record…I’ve had many, many wonderful, positive moments in my life as well as the life of my children.
  6. People LOVE our family. All of us. I knew that before…but wow…to have so many validate their love for each of us was so amazing!
  7. People continue to PRAY for our family! THANK YOU FOR THAT…to each and every one of you who has at some point lifted our names up to the Father for comfort, peace, understanding, and hope…THANK YOU!
  8. People understand. Way too many people have experienced so much pain and suffering in their life. Some due to actions of others while, severe illnesses, and still yet from decisions made by themselves. My pain and suffering do not include any type of physical illness. However, my story does include mental illness, abuse, and wrong/hurtful decisions/actions on my own part. People seem to understand the pain and know it’s something that is unavoidable but makes it no less difficult to go through.
  9. People are compassionate. They leave judgment aside and literally run with open arms to reassure the hurting. They don’t ask why or what happened. They just hug you. Thank you for that.
  10. People need people. We ARE NOT meant to do life alone. We need each other. It’s ok to NEED others. I am talking to myself here mostly. I am NOT good at allowing others to help me. I used to think it is because I am so independent and strong. BUT…that’s not it. It is PRIDE. YES, I am saying that loudly. I need to be reminded of this daily. Pride is a sin and is listed with selfishness, envy, and covetousness. Humility is the opposite of pride. I have been knocked down and humbled many times in the past several years. While it was so very painful, perhaps it was necessary to knock some sense into my thick, stubborn head. PRIDE…yeah…gotta work on that one…

Thank you, readers, for your encouraging comments and faithfully reading. I write because it helps me heal and express what’s in my heart. IF anything I write touches your heart or helps you in ANY way…that’s simply a bonus. God bless you in your troubles…we all have them…and we ALL NEED EACH OTHER.

the whole truth & nothing but,
jco

 

 

 

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